An amateur pessimist's guide to the days of the week

Today is Shatterday. It's when you contemplate the remnants of the dreams of your youth.

Tomorrow, on Shunday, you tell the world to bugger off and leave you alone, because what's the point we're all alone anyway.

Then, on Mournday, you weep for all that is lost and will never come back except in your dreams and then you wake up.

On Twosday, shit happens. Twice.

Ah, here's Whensday. The day on which you wonder if all that you have worked for and planned for will ever come to pass.

Every Thirstday, the arid desert of existence will parch your soul.

Of course on Fryday you wonder if there's anything to the Christian take on the afterlife, because then you know where you're headed.