For the lovelorn

We thought we knew all the journos in Bombay that actually read (Hi Nina! Hey there, Naresh! Jerry? Amy? Meenakshi? Naah, they don't slum it in Blogsville), so we were pleasantly surprised to see this in Mid-Day, of all places. Words that heal, by Alpana Lath Sawai, takes lonely hearts letters and gets great literature to play Agony Aunt. Some excerpts:

There’s a girl I see at the bus stop every day – I love her a lot. I have even started going to college earlier than my timings because that’s the only way to see her. I don’t know where she lives. I cannot think of anything else.
Every night I go to bed in a hurry because I know that when I wake up, I will see her soon. I used to hate mornings, but now each day is filled with the anticipation. She never looks at me but I am sure she will love me too. I have lost interest in everything else, nothing matters except that she should love me.

Jo in Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
"Go and eat your dinner; you’ll feel better after it. Men always croak when they’re hungry."

My colleague, his name is Karan, has been asking me out. I said no the first few times because I didn’t want to get mixed up in these things. But he keeps saying we should just go out for a casual coffee.
But I don’t drink coffee and I don’t want to start socialising with people from work outside office hours because you end up talking about work everywhere. However, he’s quite sweet, and he seems very gentle. I sensed that he was interested in me a while ago, but he only asked me out recently… What should I do?

Miss Steele in Sense & Sensibility by Jane Austen:
"…perhaps you young ladies may not care about the beaux, and had as lief be without them as with them. For my part, I think they are vastly agreeable, provided they dress smart and behave civil. But I can’t bear them dirty and nasty"

Way to go, Ms Sawai. (A word in your ear, though, m'dear. It's "advises" not "advices.")

Animal Passions

Alas, the hapless porcupine, his heart really bleeds, poor chap.
The quills on his fair valentine turned metaphor into a mishap.

…

Pity the poor mantis, when he’s in his Valentine’s embrace.
When the lady says "Oh God!" she’s merely saying grace.

…

On Valentine’s Day, in the water sport the hippopotami.
It’s the only way to support their entwined anatomy.

…

Snails are strange creatures; hermaphrodites every one.
On Valentine’s Day, the bastards have twice the fun.

St Valentine’s day massacre

Can i use your heart for my Valentine?
(Signed) Doctor Victor Frankenstein.

…

Would you mind awfully if should poke a
Little hole in your neck and sip? - B Stoker.

…

I sit here, holding her hand in mine—
A souvenir from my chopped-up Valentine.

St Valentine's day massacre...

...and other beastial tales. All my own work. Yenjoy.

Can i use your heart for my Valentine?
(Signed) Doctor Victor Frankenstein.

...

Would you mind awfully if should poke a
Little hole in your neck and sip? - B Stoker.

...

I sit here, holding her hand in mine -
A souvenir from my chopped-up Valentine.

...

Alas, the hapless porcupine, his heart really bleeds, poor chap.
The quills on his fair valentine turned metaphor into a mishap.

...

Pity the poor mantis, when he's in his Valentine's embrace.
When the lady says "Oh God!" she's merely saying grace.

...

On Valentine's Day, in the water sport the hippopotami.
It's the only way to support their combined anatomy.

...

Snails are strange creatures; hermaphrodites every one.
On Valentine's Day, the bastards have twice the fun

...

Got more? Come share the love in the comments section.

So you know what i did last summer... er, October

Just found that Outlook Traveller actually has one of my articles on the site archive.

Rumination over poetry on a blog, as a deadline goes whooshing by

Who reads poetry?
Other poets, mainly.
(Of varying levels
Of taste and fame and skill.)

Who reads blogs?
Just bloggers, usually.
(Net-addicted souls
With lots of time to kill.)

So who's reading this:
Blogging poets only?
(i'd better go write copy;
Got to pay my internet bill.)

Cross posted on Caferati

Why you should always carry beer when you're in snow country

You can pee your way out of an avalanche.

Bloggers unite

The Pro-Bloggers Association

— An organization that is working to get the development and writing of blogs the professional recognition and respect it deserves
— An international organization of professional bloggers and consultants who are committed to developing ethical standards for this growing career opportunity
— a new and exciting group of bloggers dedicated to the challenges and opportunities facing this new, growing path of writing and consulting: business blogging, marketing blogging, and consulting on blog development.

Media Bloggers Association (MBA)

...is a non-partisan organization dedicated to promoting MBA members and their blogs, educating bloggers, and promoting the explosion of citizen's media.

It's official now

Like it's in The Guardian and all that.

And you will see the light

Now here's some sneaky missionaries preying on clumsy typists. The folk at the Mega site of Bible studies and information use the URL http://www.blogpot.com/. So if you're typing out a blogspot blog URL, and you miss a letter, you land up on their page. Go ahead. Go see the gospel according to St Hurree, St MarginAlien, St Samit, St Jabberwock, or even the Acts of Caferati. Hallelujah.

[Thanks Les]